Monday, January 24, 2011

I'm THAT parent!

I've reached a profoundly horrifying, yet sort of amusingly awesome, moment in my life. I have become THAT parent. You know the one, or maybe you don't, don't worry I'll enlighten you.

I have become the parent that listens to their child's ideas intently and then snatches those sweet, innocent, cute, simple ideas and turns them in to my convulated, involved, exciting and totally not from a child ideas.

Yep, that's me.

Here's how I discovered this. Last weekend the twins spent the night at their grandparents and we kept the wee one with us. He was a little bummed to be missing out on the fun so we thought it was time we started the "date night" tradition with him, something we had been doing for awhile with the twins. He wanted ice cream and fun factory and to play at the mall. I turned that into, "Let's surprise him with a bunch of fun stuff other than his idea!" We still had fun but he did cry at the end because we hadn't done everything on his list. I shrugged it off as him being tired and me being awesome to think of so many fun things for him to do **patting myself on shoulder repeatedly**

Then came this weekend when the twins each had their"date night" The oldest didn't get to choose. We couldn't find a babysitter so he was instructed to go to daddy's work Christmas party (yes it was in January, whatever...) while mommy stayed home with the other two. He got to eat seafood (his favorite) and play a lot of games on daddys phone while the adults talked so he was pretty ok with it, it helped that he's 6 and we haven't fully explained the "date night" rules so he is unaware that we broke them by not letting him choose any part of it, at all.

Finally, it was time for my "aha!" moment. The younger twin asked to have his date night the next two nights, both times I forgot I was supposed to take him out and we had other family things planned. So we said how about a week night? He said ok and then his idea was to go to Lahaina for pizookies. I didn't want to drive to Lahaina on a weeknight so I began to guide his "date night" ideas.

I suggested we could make pizookies at home and daddy could keep brothers out of our way. He loves to bake and has this whole plan abotu opening a dessert bar restaurant when he grows up. So, needless to say, he was like, "Yeah, let's stay home and watch a movie and bake and brothers won't be allowed upstairs!"

Good plan right?

Except that I couldn't leave it at that. I had already guided his idea, he was overwhelmingly excited about getting in some dedicated baking time, but I had to suggest more. I then went on to plan that he do a trial run of his restaurant, invite over 20 of our closest friends (I may be exaggerating), have it on a weekend so he could stay up late, bake like 20 things (none of which come from his recipe book collection that he really wants to use), put them in sample sizes, make a sign and a menu and serve them to guests.

At this point it's going to take a week of planning and a lot of me pushing him to make it happen. But now it's been promised and he sort of thinks it's his plan and why did I go and turn this into a big thing and become that person who takes over that no one likes but everyone is scared to tell off?!?!

It's because I'm that parent. I know I should be proud of my children and their ideas and gently guide where needed but give them space to grow and learn on their own. But every once in awhile something comes over me and I become the one that will make all the plans and will make everything great and everyone happy and if I have to make them cry to get there.

I think I need to chill out.

Anyone want to come to the grand opening of Mallo Brothers Dessert bar?



  1. I love all your posts...but this one just made me smile so big. I love your self reflection and honesty. That makes you such a great Mom, in my opinion. Can't wait to read more....

  2. Thanks Nancy! I figure my many mistakes are ok so long as I keep learning from them:)