Thursday, January 5, 2017

The questioner

I found this in my blog draft folder and decided to finish it off and send it out to cyber world. My little darling is done with this phase now, but it seems worth noting for posterity.

I'm sitting in my car waiting for another kid to finish another activity.

As I sit and type this I praise the Lord and rejoice that my sweet Larry came along and is talking to our sweet baby girl because she NEVER STOPS TALKING.

I love her and I'm so happy she found her voice, but why does she have to ask WHY?? 1,000 times a day?!

Baby: Where are we going?
Me: To Costco.
Baby: Why?
Me: To buy food.
Baby: Why we need food?
Me: So we don't starve.
Baby: Why we don't want to starve?
Me: Because we would die.
Baby: Like the cat? She was a girl cat and she died and now we have a boy cat. You call him Oh Maui and I call him BB-8.
Me: The cat didn't die from starving.
Baby: What the cat died from?
Me: I don't know.
Baby: Why you don't know?
Me: Because I'm not God.
Baby: Why you not God?
Me: Because I'm you're mom.
Baby: Why?
Me: Why not?

This goes on for hours every day. 

If it's not why, her other 2 favorite talking points are what we eat for meals and grocery lists.

She likes to pretend call our family to ask them what they're eating and to make up things that she's eating that I would never let her have.

**Sample Conversation**
HI daddy, what you doin?
What you eat for breakfast?
Eggs or apples daddy, which one?
Which one?!
Why you not answer me?!?!
Well, I had donuts and coffee and sprinkles.
Bye daddy, call me after lunch.

Please keep in mind that these are pretend conversations with herself. She is getting mad at herself for not answering.

Finally, her lists. She grabs something to write with and proceeds to make lists and read them to you.

Baby: You want to go to Target? I going to Target. I'll bring the money. We'll get bananas, bandaids, dresses, stickers, red cheese, pancakes, milk, baby milk and beer. What you need mommy?
Me: I think we need bread, you could put that on the list.
Baby: No one eats bread. Need anything else?
Me: No.
Baby: K, bye!

She then attempts to leave our house on our own and kicks and screams when I point out that her shopping needs to be pretend. She also brings her scribbled drawing lists to the store when we go and gets frustrated when I can't immediately read the list of made up items written in scribbles and loops of nothing.

I don't think you can win with toddlers.

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