Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Cancelled Christmas. You know, like you do.

I'm 99% sure that you've all been missing me and my witty banter lately so I thought I'd gift you all a catch up blog for the holiday season.

Life has been very lifey lately. Sorry, but there's really no better way to put it.

Since I made the big announcement that we were having a fourth child ON PURPOSE it's really cramped my blog writing. All of a sudden I felt immense pressure to tell you about the wonder of pregnancy and the magical moments my family is having while planning for baby #4 (we can call her Marsha for now. This will not be her/his real name) The problem with these pressures are that it's just generally not my style of writing. I write the occasional sappy moments but mostly I tell you about the crazy ridiculous and sometimes horrible stuff because that's what I like to read about. It makes me feel grateful for what I have and glad I'm not going through what you're going through. Sometimes I read your stories and I get to have a "thank God it's not just me/my kids" moment. So that's mostly what I try to give to you my loyal readers.

It provided me with quite the dilemma every time my kids produced some goldenly awful moment that was oh so blog worthy. I would go to post and then have that moment of, "but they'll be like, why is she having more when she can't handle the rug rats she already has!" I've decided that haters are going to hate so the stories must be shared regardless.

For the record, I love my kids and most of our daily moments are awesome. Awesome, but not funny so we'll skip those. Today, for instance. Today, was not great. I was up at 5am prepping for a big meeting and got my kids up early so we could go Starbucks for the meeting before 7am. Getting my kids up early never works out. Moe stole his brothers underwear, Larry refused to take his medication and curly just wandered the house aimlessly. I asked them to make their lunches, it turned into a screaming fight about vegetables and arguments over cheese that is apparently too creamy. This lovely morning culminated in a lost lunchbox that I decided HAD to be found that instant that put us 30minutes and a dirty trip under the bunk beds behind schedule.

We made it to school with tears, promises and threats. After school I decide to extend an olive branch. I was all, "screw this bad day, lets do a trust exercise!" You know, like you do. So I asked them to finish their homework In My office while I helped with a project on another part of campus. This turned into more tears, promises and threats as they just went completely haywire and accomplished nothing.

Then, in a moment that will surely haunt me and my sons future therapists, I threatened to take away Christmas. I explained to my 3 cherubs that they must have been possessed by aliens because my sons didn't behave like this and then explained in detail what skipping Christmas would mean if their behavior did not Improve. I was now THAT parent.

Then we went to Costco and I fed them dinner at 3:45pm. You know, like you do. Then we got home and I got them to bed and started feeling guilty. I posted my awful moment on Facebook, but don't worry, I took the high road and blamed my husband. That's what he gets for going on business trips. Plus curly gave me the idea when he tearfully explained that missing his daddy is probably why he's being bad.

So, there's your present. Merry Christmas! You are 110% guaranteed to have been a better parent than me today even if you're not a parent.

And finally, in this new thing I'm trying, here is my gushy moment of the day. The day sucked but today was still a huge win for me. Larry is going through some especially nasty stuff right now and I worry and worry and then stress about it. But today, even though he had an awful day, he ended it with a genuine smile and mirth filled moment when he heard my new ringtone. That smile made my entire week. Then on top of that I asked him to tell me a positive for his day and without hesitating he explained that listening to na mele sing today was awesome and that he was proud of his friends and loved it. I know you don't know the details, but this is huge people, huge! Love that kid:)

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